Those wearing gourds and letting their National Geographic tits tragically sag, we gave them clothes, gave them shame.

Those that packed cuzzies and aunties into their homes, we blamed them for spreading meningitis, and being a fire risk.

Those who make lunch the main meal of the day, we called them greedy, lazy, and gave them shame.


Those who place tribal values over individuals –

Those who boil bones and suck shellfish –

Those who are afraid of gas and oil and coal, and on their art waste gold –


Those whose flags have a gap where there should be a Union Jack, we gave them shame.

Those who eat octopus, bugs and dog, we gave them shame.

Those whose church takes place on Saturdays, we gave them shame.


Those who marry at puberty –

Those who believe that Jesus came in 1855 –

Those still stuck in the Stone Age –


Those who don’t match a flesh-coloured Band-Aid, shame.

Those who shovel noodles inside their lips with chopsticks, shame.

Those whose names have chains of vowels, shame.


Those that eat with their fingers –

Those whose noses are suspiciously flat–

Those whose myths insist a bitch birthed the first man –


Those who come from countries without winter, shame.

Those who believe that beasts have souls, shame

Those that don’t get upset about death, shame


And people without metallurgy or MBAs,

And heathens who turn bones into art,

And those seditious freaks who believe you can own a beach

Are stopped from cutting down native trees

(they gotta pay ten bucks for a bag of kindling from Caltex like every other cunt.)